October 31, 2005
Love & dating...38jeal?ous adj. 1. Fearful or wary of being supplanted; apprehensive of losing affection or position.
2. Resentful or bitter in rivalry; envious: jealous of the success of others.
3. Inclined to suspect rivalry.
Having to do with or arising from feelings of envy, apprehension, or bitterness: jealous thoughts.
4. Vigilant in guarding something: We are jealous of our good name.
5. Intolerant of disloyalty or infidelity; autocratic: a jealous God.
Maybe the feeling of jealousy occurs when you know that under normal circumstances, you can't have what someone else has no matter how much you want it. That, I think, should be definition 1 or 2.
If that 'something' is a past, then, there really is nothing much you can do to dispel the feeling of jealousy that arose out of wanting that past. Nevertheless, the past has expired.
The past, like a full CD-R, is full of times shared but no more can be written on it. In a way, it has been used up; in a way, it has expired. As long as it's not corrupted or chewed up by the dogs (like the fate of my cordless handphone at home), it can be retrieved and its contents read. But, that's about all. It's impossible to write anymore new data into it.
The future, which begins from this moment on, holds limitless possibilities.
Fear not, the green monster. He's no match for the Little Dragon Girl.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 15:36
October 30, 2005
From the papers...30SINGAPORE : Students will be able to use handheld electronic Chinese language dictionaries in national exams from 2007.
The Education Ministry says this is for the Chinese Language composition part of the PSLE and GCE 'N', 'O' and 'A' levels.
Only handheld electronic dictionaries approved by the Singapore Examinations and Assessment Board will be allowed.
It has approved the Hansvision Handheld Dictionary PX2051, developed especially for this purpose by Creative Technology, in collaboration with the Education Ministry.
The Chinese Language to Chinese Language electronic dictionary costs S$24 each, and Creative Technology will make necessary arrangements with schools for students to buy them.
Developers of other such dictionaries may submit their products for approval through the Education Ministry.
Currently, approved print dictionaries can be used in 'O' level Mother Tongue composition exams, and from next year, also in PSLE Mother Tongue composition exams.
Last year, the Chinese Language Review Committee recommended the use of the handheld electronic device in compositions to enhance the learning of the Chinese Language. - CNA /ct
xxx
Happened to be on MSN with girl on that night when I heard the above news over the TV.
I said...
Well, yet another mind boggling irony about singapore. no wonder we need creative younger generation to suss out the solution to the problem. except... i think, the younger gen IS the problem now. my gosh... i didn't even bother to roll my eyes just now when i heard the news about the new digital chinese dictionary that the students can bring to ch compo exam.
why don't they just discard chinese as a subject? make it an optional thing.. u know... if ur parents have biz links in china, n u wanna inherit the biz, then take the subj lah.. else.. why bother?
I also said...
every year national day or sthg, every school give one free digital ch dict to the students lah.... just in case they need to speak the lang to order a plate of char kway teow. then again, there's always macdonalds.
can u believe it??? i dunno wat the hell is in the MOE guys head lor..
I then said...
erm, the surface objective is... students will ve easier time? the deeper objective? the digital dict is by *****ive tech.. and guess who gets the most profit out of this?
I ended off saying...
MOE disappoints again and again when it comes to ch edu in singapore.
now students dun even need to appreciate the process of turning pages of ch dictionary to find a word.
Now I say...
Absurdities never cease when it comes to education in Singapore.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 14:25
October 26, 2005
A third of my middle fingerIn my life so far, there are two things that stir up a lot of emotions in me. One is positive, one is negative. The two things are... Lord of The Rings and Chinese education in Singapore.
One is positive, one is negative. You already know which is which.
I'm waiting to read the news tomorrow on TodayOnline. Then, maybe, finally, we can return to a long lost thread - From the papers.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 23:30
October 19, 2005
What's more?And every few minutes of every day... we wait for something, someone.
About a third of our everyday waking moment is caught up with waiting. Or is it not?
But it's waiting that has just given me about 15 minutes to blog here.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 17:48
The absence of timeListened to a radio program this morning, on my Dad's ride to school. In the average life span of 78 years, we spend 14 hours having an orgasm and 24 years sleeping.
Well? No wonder life really sucks.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 17:45
October 16, 2005
The surprise of LukaShe bought me an album. A surprise. I merely asked for her to help me find Suzanne Vega's Luka. I meant mp3. I've gotten an album.
Luka lives on the second floor. Thank you for letting me live in your thoughts.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 14:54
October 13, 2005
Love & dating...37我 想 说 的 是...
结 果。
他 和 她 认 识 2 年，拍 拖 5 年。结 果，他 们 分 手 了。他 说 因 为 太 了 解 而 分 开；她 说 他 变 了。
他 和 她 认 识 半 年，断 断 续 续 地 拍 拖 5 年。结 果，他 们 在 街 上 擦 肩 而 过，所 有 的 一 切 也 只 能 一笑 而 过。
他 和 她 认 识 几 个 月，拍 拖 7 年。结 果，他 们 结 婚 了。结 果，故 事 不 知 会 怎 么 延 续 下去。
他 和 她 认 识 了，拍 拖 了，也 结 婚 了。结 果，她 在 外 面 和 另 一 个 他 认 识 了，拍 拖 了，
也 忘 记 了 家 里 的。结 果，又 有 一 个 小 孩 拥 有 的 双 亲 幸 福 被 牺 牲 掉 了。
结 果，我 们 都 很 执 着 于 结 果，却 没 有 发 现 结 果 最 后 也 不 过 是 个 过 渡 期。
xxx
这 里 所 做 的，的 的 确 确，没 有 结 果。起 码，没 有 你 们 所 追 求 的 那 种 结 果。不 要 问 我 有 什 么 结 果；不 需 要 对 我 说 这 没 有 结 果。我 根 本 也 还 没 学 会 过 程，怎 么 敢 奢 盼 结 果。
我 根 本 也 还 没 学 会 过 程，怎 么 敢 奢 盼 结 果？ 不 过 我 学 到 过 程 的 重 要 性，学 到 享 受 每 一 刻。我 曾 经 也 感 慨 时 间 无 情。一 转 眼，几 年 过 去，还 是 一 无 所 获。后 来，我 才 发 现 和 时 间 的 赛 跑，和 时 间 的 交 换，根 本 是 多 余 的。自 时 间 的 开 始，人 类 始 终 输 给 时 间。如 果 要 想 某 年 后 或 岁 数 时，有 所 获，其 实 不 过 是 给 自 己 制 造 压 力。压 力，它 不 是 不 好，只 是 压 力 对 某 些 东 西 有 益，对 某 些 东 西 却 是 庸 人 自 扰。于 是，我 学 会 了 不 去 在 乎 一 段 感 情 的 未 来，一 篇 爱 情 故 事 的 结 局。总 之，要 用 时 间 做 限 制 的，我 已 经 学 会 置 于 身 外，不 加 考 虑。简 单 来 说，‘结 果’ 对 我 来 说，原 来 没 什 么 意 义 了。
时 间 的 巨 轮 不 留 情 地 旋 转 。天 黑 了，天 又 亮 了，又 黑 了。让 它 去 转，我 不 在 乎。世 界 上，根 本 没 有 什 么 永 远。永 远 只 是 从 现 在 到 下 一 秒，我 们 拥 有 彼 此，我 们 都 记 得 对 彼 此 好，我 们 都 记 得 为 自 己，也 为 彼 此 好 好 过。结 果，这 一 秒，我 们 都 没 有 白 活。结 果，即 使 没 有 他 们 追 求 的 结 果，我 们 还 是 充 满 感 激。
简 单 地 说 ，她 和 她 认 识 了 半 年，还 在 摸 索 一 个 拍 拖 的 过 程。结 果，每 一 刻 都 还 过 得 快 乐。 这 不 是 现 代 都 市 生 活 里 少 有 的 骄 傲 吗？
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 23:00
October 12, 2005
She has spoken你 的 insecurities ， 我 好 想 统 统 放 在 一 个 布 袋 里，埋 在 地 里 。。。
想 说 的 是，
其 实 已 经 在 埋 了。有 时，经 雨 水 洗 涤，土 便 松 了 一 点，冒 出 了 一 点 点。不 过，真 的 已 经，已 经 很 好、很 好 了。
还 要 说 的 是，谢 谢 你。
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 21:59
October 11, 2005
and so...And so, I write about the most mundane of mundane stuff. I sometimes wonder is it because of my work (tuition is my work too) that leaves me with 1. little free time 2. little waking and alert moments 3. little convenience 4. littlest of little creative juice 5. little fodder for gossip and bitching?
Like, really, when was the last time I wrote something that made even myself chuckle while I'm writing it? I think I need a change of environment...
ha! There you are! In Chinese, we call it the 'fu2 bi3' technique of creative writing. hoho... when the content is in lack, we call upon the technique.
stop bullshitting, princess. Yes, mam.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 10:49
I was impersonated, then assassinated. So, who died?Dearth of creative juice to blog here. Actually, there was just pulp left since many months ago. I jus don't know how I managed to smoke through a few entries here and there again.
I did think of something to write about. For e.g. I can remember now that I had enough thoughts for a return to resume my Love & Dating series. A few days back. Of course, I either didn't have the time or the energy or the convenience to pen an entry on that. A few days back.
So, a few days later, now, I'm just sitting around during my free period in school, thinking what was it that I wanted to write about. And start getting quite irritated with myself for not being able to remember and for not having the discipline to write it down when I had thoughts about it.
jeez.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 10:42
October 04, 2005
Choices.I do not like setting MCQ questions for exam papers. In the first place, I do not like setting Maths paper. In the even more first place, I do not like setting papers.
I just finished setting Section A of the SA paper for Maths for my level. That would be the easiest-to-score-hardest-to-set section. I feel like pulling my hair out. I turned to eating the YanYan Chocolate Biscuits that Ah Girl brought up to the com lab. I didn't really know YanYan can taste this good. It must be all the MCQ questions!
xxx
Where is your positivity relocating to?Shameless blog is kinda funny. Everytime he informed of a change in his blog add (cos his coll are tasteless and bored enough to google him and invade his public privacy), the blog becomes a dormant one.
So, everytime I got down to changing the link to his blog from here, his blog is no longer there. It's like playing catch with him. And, I wonder where is he relocating his blog to now...
Thought of this cos thought of him just now. Yes, when I had this desperate need to pull my hair and figured it'd be better if there's someone beside me to let me pull his hair. Well, shameless doesn't have much length of hair to tug at. But, cos Ah girl's com was playing 'In the end', I inevitably thought of my PPGMCE fren. Wonder where the hell is he now...
xxx
All that cheese...Secret Recipe is having their 5th year anniversary. Full cakes going at 50% off and slices on a one-for-one promo. Well...?
xxx
A Strawberry Shortcake lunchboxThe only reason why I would buy it is if I really wanted to show off to Jermaine. But, I have no inclination to show off, especially not to little girls 17 years younger than me!
Nevertheless, I still find the idea of whipping it out for lunch, seated outside Raffles Place, coated in formal shirt and blazer rather cute.
xxx
That kind of gaze.I can identify it. It's not difficult. It says, 'I am so hopelessly smitten with you.' haha
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 15:57
October 02, 2005
Clifford Pier GardenWe chanced upon this really cool place at Clifford Pier, just below the bridge that links between Hitachi Tower and Clifford Pier. What's cool about it is that the entrance was a neon board which made it look like a Tiananmen of sort inside. But, it really was not... or rather, it's lesser than that.
Thinking it was not a place for us to explore, we went to buy Pokka Green Tea at the Mamak store at Clifford Pier and wanted to just take a little walk around that area. Drawn to the music of our parent's generation, we turned to our right and saw what exactly was the interior of this Tiananmen lookalike.
It was an open air restaurant with (we assumed) PRC ladies donned in long sequinned dress, singing songs my parents could humm to as well as a few I could sing along with. Seated on our side, infront of us, but behind the restaurant were a few middle aged men. One or two were topless and most were drinking beer or something. The free riders of the music, and performance from the garden.
We seated ourselves on the parapet and joined in the free-rider business, with Pokka Green Tea. I drifted off to light sleep on her shoulders, with chinese pop from the 80s in the background. Nice.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 22:16
我 想 说 的 是 ...那 天， 看 着 同 事 们 在 台上 跳 舞， 我 心 里 有 点 羡 慕。 那 两 支 现 代 舞 是 几 位 同 事 为 庆 儿 童 节 而 排 练 的。 跳 地 很 好， 看 得 出 有 几 位 同 事 是 ‘舞’ 林 高 手。 其 中 一 首 歌 我 觉 得 比 较 有 动 感， 感 觉 很 不 错！
我 喜 欢 跳 舞， 我 喜 欢 在 很 快 节 奏， 很 有 动 感 的 音 乐 下 跳 舞。 尽 管 如 此， 我 不 是 那 种 会 跳 到 忘 我 境 界 的 人。 我 只 是 喜 欢 跳 舞， 跟 着 音 乐 的 节 拍 摆 动 身 子； 喜 欢 把 舞 步 当 成 一 种 运 动。 像 曾 经 学 过 的 Hip Hop Jazz， 我 就 挺 喜 欢 的！ 我 不 喜 欢 规 定 的 舞 步 跳 舞， 所 以 从 来 没 想 学 社 交 舞， 我 觉 得 跳 舞 还 是 好 玩 就 好， 其 他 跳 得 好 不 好 也 不 是 很 重 要 。 话 虽 如 此， 不 过 如 果 可 以 跳 得 又 开 心 又 好 看， 还 是 最 好 不 过 了 啦！
每 当 看 舞 蹈 表 演， 我 都 会 想 可 惜 小 时 候 没 有 学 舞 蹈。 有 好 几 次， 我 想 过 学 成 人 芭 蕾， 因 为 我 曾 经 听 过 芭 蕾 舞 可 以 是 各 种 舞 蹈 的 基 础， 使 学 任 何 一 种 舞 蹈 都 会 比 较 容 易 上 手。 不 过， 实 在 是 心 有 余 而 力 不 足， 钞 票 也 不 足。 后 来 就 还 是 不 了 了 之 了。
这 星 期 天， 回 出 席 同 事 在 外 头 的 一 场 舞 蹈 表 演， 在 过 往 的 校 园 -- 国 大。 那 天， 看 她 在 台 上 跳 舞 。。。 我 想， 这 星 期 天 应 该 挺 有 看 头 的。
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 22:00